Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Randomize