in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Randomize
