How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize
