i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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