i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize