Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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