Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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