But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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