I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Randomize