As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
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