And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
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The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
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Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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