I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I think weed is turning my hair brown
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize