sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Randomize
