I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
