every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
