I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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