someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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