i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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