Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
