Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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