i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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