What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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