I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I think people are normalizing furries
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
