weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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