Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
