Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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