I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
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