if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
