I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
