Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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