I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
