She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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