office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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