i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
