I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
