Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize