His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Panties = found
Randomize
