Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize