last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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