i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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