I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
