this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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