Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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