Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
