i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
You pole danced in your parka.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize