So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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