we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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