my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Ladies don't puke and tell
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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