eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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