possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
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