You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize
