just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
